Raging Narcissism
Entries September 22/23, '93
9/22/93
So boring. Back at work with nothing to do. I am waiting for more news on the denim line. The designers have been with W since 12:30 am, reviewing summer ‘94. Again. I sent out some memos re. my “new position” and that’s about it.
The most important memo we got today: All employees now have to drink their beverages out of CK branded mugs and CK branded mugs only. Maybe I can become the design director for CK mugs in my next demotion. It’s so ironic since I caught Calvin drinking his coffee from my pretty pink mug, just a week ago.
Elaine is permanently weepy and asked me for a Valium, Marnie left with the worst cramps she’s ever had (I gave Anaprox). I’m like the stress reduction dispensary. Julia’s whole neck has jammed up, Dora has a migraine and Mo has hit the booze. Apart from this, all is well at Alice’s Mad Hatter Tea Party.
My 8:30 am meeting with W was like a lesson in narcissism. She wants to, and is going to, rule this company “on every level.” She talks a lot, has big ideas, but does not get down to details. Basically, she admitted that she doesn’t do design direction, nor does she do merchandising, but still I can’t do anything creative for CK Bridge. The team is upset and confused yet again and they haven’t told me why exactly. W intends to make an “announcement” in this afternoon’s meeting. Yesterday, I asked her to give me time to decide on accepting the jeans position.
“I can say whatever I want,” she snapped at me.
Calvin came in with a bag of goodies ( W’s linen samples?) during the big meeting. He looked like a flushed, shy boy. What is going on with those two? She’s definitely smitten with him. She wants to be Calvin II, like personify him. She told me this story about some blue blazer she’d worn to work that had belonged to her ex-husband. “It was a quintessential Calvin piece,” she said. “Everyone thought so, it was classic Calvin and I want to help him achieve that.” I had no idea what she meant.
Also, she wants to: Oversee all the branding of the stores.
Create a new linen home collection.
Be responsible for all licensed accessories.
Control CK Bridge and Jeans etc. Like basically control the entire Calvin Klein empire.
She was so bitchy about Jayne, the knives are out for her too. I’m afraid for Jayne’s position, she just had a baby! I’m getting so sick of clothes and fashion, sorting through piles of magazines and their content. Am I finally “enlightened”? I suspect my phone is bugged. I feel bugged. My own tape recorder jammed throughout the big meeting. Anyway, Elaine was just told by W why I was not invited to yesterday’s CK Bridge meeting. That I will be working on CK jeans only. W told Elaine she was too busy to tell the others of our team, so “she (me) should tell them so herself.”
Yeah right! I never even accepted the job.
I’m on the train going home, it is 8:15 pm. I got to work at 8.15 am. Twelve hours and they dare say that I’m “never there.” Oh God, I cannot stand this much longer. It is all so dark. Tonight’s meeting was a free-for-all, Danny, W, Robert, and others, none of them designers, yet all present to give their input with a hodgepodge of ideas. Like “my wife was wearing this really cool DKNY top, I will bring it in tomorrow.” Humiliating! The way Calvin treats me in front of everyone, excludes me from meetings, gives people the courage to be rude to me too. Regardless of the fact that the CK Jean collection had already been approved by him, Danny still knocked it, as if it would score him extra points. As we left, W said she would write me a job description, like that was doing me a favor. Why is she suddenly pretending to act nice? I so don’t trust her. Calvin may have told her to “make it work,” as otherwise they never get it all done in time for the fashion show. Maybe the penny dropped that she really needs my help on the jeans. Sick how calculating people can be!
9/23/93
Very important day! A shift in energy. I showed all my “stuff” (gathered evidence) to the Jerries and they feel we have enough for a very strong case, so today we decided: I will talk to Calvin see if he wants to work on a settlement of our contract, and I will stay to finish up summer ‘94 and maybe conceptualize the next jean delivery. Help Elaine to take it forward. I’ll do so, if they’re willing to settle. The Jerries said I should accept no less than $****. This ain’t so bad. Plus, tonight is the zoning hearing for our factory conversion (an old building (Alastair and I got and plan convert into our home and studio). I pray we get we get the approvals. What a week! More later…
W sent me a memo: she has officially cancelled my Europe trip! This will be the first time in my professional life that I miss Premier Vision (the international fabric show). It’ll be like trying to design alone, blindfolded. Elaine got a call from W at home at 9:00 pm saying she is no longer a designer on the Bridge line but is just on jeans with me, and she can’t go to PV either. She also heard that W had shown the line Elaine worked on for summer ‘94 to Calvin, Zach, Jackie and her assistant and they made changes and toasted them with beer to new beginnings, in front of Dora who then told the entire CK team. I’m still waiting to meet with Calvin, but apparently he’s too busy. Meanwhile, I have a denim meeting with W at 3:30. I’m not looking forward to it. But at least we’re in the last stages. AND! Our ZONING WAS APPROVED!
Strange week with so many important events.
who is W?